Florence Given on why books want extra queer, messy characters

In the event you’re a millennial or Gen Zer, it’s seemingly Florence Given wants no introduction – with over half one million followers, she’s well-known for her feminist art and activism (and for those who’re not amongst that 500,000-strong group, chances are high you’ve nonetheless come throughout her vibrant and kitsch illustrations sooner or later in your life).

On the age of simply 21, Florence was praised for spreading relatable phrases of knowledge in her first non-fiction e book Women Don’t Owe You Pretty – a manifesto overlaying the important thing pillars of feminism – from poisonous physique and sweetness requirements, to id and sexism. Earlier this 12 months, she additionally began a podcast, Exactly, discussing intercourse, social media and relationships.

However two years on, nonetheless solely 23-years-old, Florence celebrated the publication of her debut fiction providing – Girlcrush – a cautionary story in regards to the pressures of social media and a younger bisexual girl named Eartha, who has the unenviable job of changing into a viral sensation in a single day. One thing Florence little question can relate to. However among the many writer-artist’s ever rising success, one widespread theme stands proud and stays true: her dedication to problem social norms and a want to be a voice for her technology, one thing that is not at all times simple (particularly in a world when anybody may be cancelled or known as out on the drop of a hat).

Regardless of having beforehand been open about self-love and confidence by way of her artwork, Florence says it’s the brand new and scary idea of writing fiction that actually noticed her confront and embrace her vulnerability. Being ‘imperfect’ is one thing she says she’s at all times struggled with, however has now realised is one thing to lean into, somewhat than run from.

“I am a large perfectionist to the purpose the place I will not do one thing if I believe I will do it badly. It is one thing that has held me again in numerous areas,” she explains. “Fairly than exhibiting up imperfectly and getting higher at it, [in the past] I’ve simply not proven up in any respect.”

Lifting the lid additional on her writing course of, it’s simple to listen to the eagerness in Florence’s voice over the cellphone. “There’s a lot freedom in not having to be excellent, and I needed to do one thing a bit messier this time – the characters in Girlcrush are messy,” she explains, admitting this was lacking in her earlier literary providing, WDOYP.

She encourages others to search out consolation in studying about characters that don’t fairly have their life collectively, stressing that we urgently want extra of them in books and on TV, together with 3D queer characters. “Like having soiled knickers mendacity round in your bed room,” Florence says. “It is these moments once you chuckle, not as a result of they’re humorous however you realize you are not the one one.”

“[But still] something I do is about bringing ladies collectively. I wish to write books for the remainder of my life – it offers me a lot pleasure, even ache typically, however in a approach that helps me develop and study extra.”

Florence factors out that, as any individual who’s Very A lot On-line, she has skilled how lovely social media may be, in addition to how brutal, deceiving and highly effective it’s too. So, it is no shock that Girlcrush charts the highs and lows of social media platforms – one thing anybody with an Instagram or TikTok account can vouch for – and dissects the lives of influencers who utilise them to make a dwelling. It may be an thrilling Pandora’s field of alternatives for some, however not all social media customers wish to be observed, or are actively searching for recognition, when utilizing the apps – but they’re nonetheless susceptible to all of the sudden going viral (very like Eartha).

Florence confirms this a part of her novel was additionally impressed by parts of her actual life, saying, “My pals who aren’t influencers are going by way of this simply by placing one thing on TikTok and they do not know the best way to deal with it [when going viral].”

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She’s come to understand – now greater than ever – that customers want to remain self-aware about how they function on-line, and its influence on our happiness and social lives offline, too. “I might go to events and watch ladies take footage of one another after which argue all the night – then they’d submit the image on Instagram the following day as if nothing occurred,” she reminisces. “Everybody would remark ‘omg I want I used to be there’… No you do not, it was an terrible fucking evening [but nobody would ever publicly admit that].”

This steers our chat onto the requirements all of us face each single day and the way they will push us into constructing a ‘near excellent’ facade on-line (or at the least attempt to, as in any case there’s no such factor as ‘excellent’). “You create an ordinary for your self on social media that is above the requirements we have already got from the patriarchy, and attempting to be lovely to get by on this world,” Florence says thoughtfully. “Extra persons are dwelling this cut up life [between who you want to be and who you currently are] to the purpose we do not even query it anymore, we simply know that that is the best way it’s. And nonetheless we really feel shit about it. We all know all the pieces is curated, nevertheless it nonetheless hurts to see folks doing higher than us, or who’re happier in areas that we aren’t.”

It’s one thing that placing pen to paper actually made her pay attention to. “Till somebody writes about the best way we do issues, you do not actually think about them,” she says, including that it pressured her to set stricter boundaries. “One of many issues I do as a bodily boundary, for instance, is preserve my cellphone out of my bed room earlier than I am going to mattress, so I do not scroll at evening or very first thing within the morning.”

She additionally advises “taking all the pieces with a pinch of salt” in the case of consuming content material and realising it’s not a case of ‘one measurement matches all’. A number of years in the past, Florence adopted the catchphrase “It’s an exquisite day to dump him” to remind people who life is just too brief to remain in poisonous relationships that don’t make you content. However, as she factors out, not everybody took it effectively. “I do know I used to shout ‘dump him’ on the web however what actually annoys me in regards to the notion of that’s folks thought I meant ‘everybody ought to dump your boyfriend’ – however actually it was about saying it so ladies who stumble throughout it take it as an indication in the event that they had been already eager about it.”

Florence goes on to clarify that not all the pieces is black and white, each with social media nor with relationship in a perpetually on-line world (see: Tinder’s recent 10 year anniversary changing the way we look for love forever). One of many causes Florence wrote Girlcrush was to indicate the chaos of dwelling by way of this ‘gray space’ – representing the utter *messiness* of all of it, which incorporates coping with heartbreak and rejection.

As a queer girl within the public eye, relationship has advanced and adjusted along with her success too. However how a lot of her personal relationship expertise is mirrored in her new e book? “I’ve had many ladies ghost me earlier than,” she admits. “You begin to shield your ego and id. For some time I would nearly projected my previous onto people who had been utterly harmless and assumed they had been going to do what the entire others did. However I’ve realized to deal with folks as a person.”

She displays on how same-sex relationship can simply grow to be blurred too. “As ladies, you are nearly anticipated to be okay with being pals, however really you are getting your coronary heart damaged. If somebody asks ‘do you wish to be pals?’ and you realize you do not as a result of you realize deep down you secretly hope to sleep collectively once more, don’t do this and preserve that boundary.”

Her recommendation for anybody experiencing rejection is to let your self undergo a mini grieving interval. Really feel all of it. Do the ‘ego factor’ to console your self by screaming ‘fuck them, did not like them anyway’ – however positively don’t say it to them. “Write it in your notes app as an alternative, since you suppose sending it will train them a lesson, nevertheless it received’t.”

Finally, Florence’s deep hope is that individuals will use this e book as a springboard to have conversations about their lives and the emotions they discover too awkward to verbalise. Perhaps striving for perfection isn’t the important thing to happiness in any case. As a substitute, braving the journey of confusion, compassion and studying curves is the place the true repay lies – and it is a highway a lot nicer to journey with some (hopefully) relatable literature in your pocket as you go.

Girlcrush (printed by Octopus) is out now